I don’t think I’m alone when I say my greatest struggle has been in trying to figure out what my life is really all about. Sure life is a gift…from God, but what’s it worth, really? What’s the point of all my effort? All this striving?
For me…these questions that never seem fully answered. I’ve been both busy and content. But often there remains a nagging sense of disquiet. Of doubt, and uncertainty about how much what I’m doing really matters…at least from a kingdom perspective.
Am I doing the right thing? Or just doing things right?
Today’s Christian lives a life that is so close to the world. Perhaps too close? We all seem to want and to do the same things. We spend our time and our money in the same ways. Our worries are the same. Frankly, there seems to be little to no little separation between the patterns of our lives and those of our non-Christian counterparts. Certainly, not what I think of when I read that we’re to “come out from among them and be separate (2 Cor 6:17).”
A word of caution
In the past and now, women, I think, have been particularly susceptible because of religious, cultural, and social expectations. Historically, we have been relied upon to uphold, and give sanction to even the most immoral and unjust elements of our societies…especially when incentivized by the desire to protect one’s immediate family and preserve a particular class or status.
But we’ve had help. Because so many people depend on us, women are encouraged to take the lives they’re already leading, what they’re already doing, or what other people need them to do, and put a kind of ‘God-gloss’ on it so everyone can just be on their way.
Too frequently, service to immediate family is presented as the full and complete extent of every woman’s calling.
As if every woman’s calling can be known. But as a result, we can find ourselves searching for a rationale for doing the things we’re already doing. Unfortunately, omitting what God has already told us to do. Certainly, this can’t be right. Cain brought that sacrifice in Genesis, and we know how that story ended.
Now don’t get me wrong. Yes, everything we do can be done with joy and to the glory of God, but taking what is already in our hand and assuming that this is the sacrifice God wants is still not the right approach. We still should not assume that fulfilling the expectations of family, even well-meaning and well-intentioned, is the same as walking in God’s kingdom plan and purpose for our individual lives.
I’ve always thought it interesting that most of the women we know by name from Scripture led lives that even today, we would call extra-ordinary. Rahab, Tamar, Abigail, Esther…even Mary made decisions were outside the normal expectations for women. While each of them had their own share of responsibilities and expectations, their calling, their purpose fell outside of those parameters. Even the virtuous woman of Proverbs 31 was known for opening “her arms to the poor and reach[ing] out her hands to the needy (31:20).”
So, obviously, we still have families. We have work. School. Relationships. Stress. Life.
But how do we go redeem the time that we have? And balance our responsibilities with a calling that could very well be found beyond the familiar and familial.
Evaluate Your Life
Not to give myself any undue credit, but I think starting with the question is important. As Socrates states in Plato’s Apology, “the unexamined life is not worth living”.
Throughout Scripture we can intuit the connection between living a life of purpose and examining our lives. Jeremiah confirms that God has a plan for us (29:11). Then in Psalms, King David asks God to search and try him (139:23). And while we know that David was a man after God’s own heart (I Sam 13:14), much later in Acts, we see that David did in fact, fulfill his purpose. Verse 36 states that when “David had served God’s purpose in his own generation, he fell asleep (13:36).”
So even in this one example, there is a vibrant and tangible connection between serving God’s purpose and examining our lives. Evaluating our purpose, our alignment with God’s kingdom plan, and our place in the body of Christ, seems a most valuable line of questioning. And I would offer that we should ask ourselves these questions frequently, whether at the end of the old year, or the beginning of a new.
How much kingdom living am I really doing? Is my life aligned with what God has said and with what God is doing?
Seeking answers to these questions in a constructive versus condemnatory way can only bring us closer to God’s heart and plan for our lives.
In the Meantime
But what should we do in the meantime?
Do we sit on the sidelines and wait for some big reveal? Should we fast and pray until God gives us our ‘special mission’? I don’t think so. We are called to service in the here and now. And Jesus has given us a fairly clear picture of how Christians should “redeem their time” in Matthew 25:35-40. Feed the hungry. Serve the sick and the poor. Visit those in prison. Protect the stranger.
In fact, I’m sure each of us has experienced some unfairness or injustice in our own lives. Perhaps you grew up in poverty and know what it’s like to miss meals or to be without a winter coat. Or perhaps your parent or a loved one was in prison and you experienced the pain of that separation. Or maybe you come from a family of immigrants and know what the stress of a new country, or a new language and new friends feels like. In all of these experiences lie seeds of compassion which can inspire us to action, if we let them. We just have to be careful that we don’t allow the expectations of others and even our own desires to keep us from doing what God has already commanded.
There’s no mystery here. We don’t have to wait until we have a ‘special leading’. We just need to pick one and get started. Serve and trust that God will redirect us if needed.
